That’s it Facebook “friends”, I’m leaving. I guess I don’t have anything else to share with you. I kind of have been trying to like your stuff, but really, it’s clear to me now that we just have nothing in common. I don’t like your pages, you don’t support my causes, I never attended any of your events, and we were never ever tagged in a picture together. It’s probably my thing: while most of you have hundreds of people to connect with, I have always made an effort to keep YOU in a select, two-digit group.
But let’s be honest, who are these 91 individuals? Well, eighteen of them are family, and by family I mean from my mom to my 3rd cousin. And you might think I wouldn’t leave this great channel otherwise I could cut a line of communication. You are wrong: less you see your family more you like them, coz when you guys get together you realize how you have nothing in common. I mean, I am happy when they get married and have kids, but I would rather hear that through my grandma so I also will end up hearing some gossip. Besides, those who care really talk to me, by phone, Skype, personally or in dreams. Yes, even dead relatives contact me more then some Facebook family.
There is also the “colleagues” group. A bunch of people who went to school with you or you worked together, but not the ones you became friends with: I’m talking about those who “add” you and you were embarrassed to ignore. Either they are using you to make volume in their accounts, or maybe…no, they are using you. So now that I’m leaving I can say: if in two years at the university you never choose me for your studies group, why should I now let you to see my honeymoon pictures? And it doesn’t matter I shouldn’t publish such an intimate moment on the internet.
The third kind of people I’m trying to eliminate of my digital life I nominated “friends of friends”, the most awkward type for a relationship. Basically you don’t know them, but they know your dad, or your best friend; so you add them in consideration to your beloveds, and then regret forever having to share your thoughts with people who invite you daily to Farmville and post Evanescence videos. Most of the time they friend you coz your mom suggested, and again, they think it’s cool to have 687 contacts on their list.
Last, but not least annoying sort of online person: the deluder. That is the person you got so happy to find online and then learned he doesn’t give a shit about you. He accepted your friendship and that was it: he doesn’t comment on your status, he doesn’t like your links or albums; he’s not even capable to write “Happy B-day” on your wall. These people are not gonna ever even get to know I’m talking about them, coz they won’t click on my note! So f* you! You are never gonna see it anyway.
To that 10 left: you know my address, you have my phone and Skype contact, you have my e-mail. Maybe we don’t talk all the time, but I know our friendship is still there coz 3 months ago we exchanged 5 e-mails in one week, and sometimes that is enough for a whole year. And I love you and/or admire you and/or think you’re fucking awesome and/or share the same parents with you so we could spend the rest of our lives apart, I would always share my intimate pics with you.
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